Waiting on God’s Best

waitingforgodsbest Waiting on Gods Best

Lately it has been on my heart a lot to share with all the single ladies (and guys if they are reading or listening) why waiting on God’s best is worth it. I promised a blog post with more details on my journey and some helpful tips, so here we go!

I want to start off by first saying:

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE SINGLE!

I am yelling at you out of love. Tough love. As your fellow sister in Christ embracing you with a warm hug and a little screaming icon wink Waiting on Gods Best But seriously I always thought something was wrong with me because I have been single for over 3 years now. Let me tell you my story quickly if you don’t know.

I actually got married at the young age of 19 back in 2007 to someone I knew for less than a year. He was military, our entire engagement he was deployed, and we rushed in to marriage. Needless to say we didn’t know each other well enough, we both had drinking problems, and we constantly fought. A couple of times he almost got abusive, so we tried counseling but that didn’t change anything. So I made the decision to leave. I remember thinking I was going to go to hell for getting divorced (being raised Catholic everything felt very condemning).

After that relationship, I jumped in to another serious relationship like literally the day I got divorced. It was with a guy I went to college with and he was a good guy. He was the most attractive guy I ever dated so I got motivated and that was actually one of my inspirations for losing 60 lbs. We stayed together 3 years and after I graduated college we just grew apart. Our goals and lives were so different and I didn’t see it working long term so I ended it.

dancewithgod Waiting on Gods Best

Can I tell you that was the hardest decision I EVER made? I knew for so long it wasn’t right, but I stayed in it trying to force it work. Yes he was a nice guy and did nice things for me. He was a good person. But, he was not God’s best for me. I was just settling and I didn’t know myself or what I really wanted in life.

So after that was when I actually got back in to church (had not been since I was 14, went back at the age of 24 to a Christian church). I found God again and found myself. The first year was the hardest year ever. I cried many nights and felt so lonely. But, God just kept drawing me in to Him. So, I got focused on staying as busy as I could, started a business (my Beachbody coaching business), and volunteered at church to help people as much as I could.

Then I found my PASSION in life was being a coach, I quit my full time job at the college, and moved to Charlotte NC back in August 2013. I was doing things I never thought I was capable of doing being alone. Things that scared the crap out of me before. It was empowering! I was finding myself and grew so close to God.

All I have focused on these last 3 years is just God, my business, helping people, being healthy, and my loved ones. Yes of course I have nights where I feel lonely or wonder if I will ever find someone. Yes I have tried dating and have come across some bad situations and had bad experiences. My ex even came back in to my life a couple of times, one happened over the holidays. I thought it was meant to be and again was trying to force it to work and BOY WAS I WRONG!

I didn’t listen to what I knew God was telling me was right for me, which was NOT my ex and for me to not worry about dating but to just focus on Him. So I ended all of that craziness and again felt so renewed and empowered. After that I decided I would just again focus on God, my business, my health, helping people, and my loved ones. I truly didn’t feel ready to date anyway after going through that, I needed to find myself again.

life Waiting on Gods Best

Then all of a sudden BOOM! This absolutely AMAZING guy that I met at a business conference back in November came back in to my life. Like just out of nowhere we all of a sudden reconnected. I wasn’t focused on finding someone and didn’t feel like the timing was right, but I don’t care. Because to pass up this opportunity would be the dumbest thing EVER! This guy is literally everything I have ever prayed for, makes me a better person, makes me SO GIDDY and the happiest I have ever been, I could just keep going on. He is truly an amazing man of God that wants the same things in life that I do.

What is going to happen? Well I am pretty sure I know and so do my closest friends, but I will keep it to myself for now and share with you all as things progress icon smile Waiting on Gods Best

But the point I wanted to make with all of this is that if you just focus on GOD and becoming a better YOU, it will happen when you least expect it. I know people always say that and people always told me that and I kind of just wanted to be like “yeah whatever shut up.” But it is so true!

So here are some closing tips for you that have helped me and it is what I have done!

  1. If you want to attract a better mate, focus on becoming a better one yourself. Personal development books and conferences have radically changed my life. I highly recommend Dani Johnson and Tony Robbins.
  2. Don’t just look for what you can GET from a relationship, but focus on what you can GIVE.
  3. You have to love yourself and know yourself before you can completely love someone else, without any insecurities or jealousy or any of that mess.
  4. Stay focused on God and give it to Him, including the timing of when it happens.
  5. Stay busy and connected with your community, friends, and family.
  6. Help other people. When you are feeling down, I cannot tell you how much it perks you UP to go help someone else. So often we feel our situation is so terrible when there are people out there in MUCH worse situations.

I really hope this helps you guys! I know the struggle is real as a single person, but I am just so passionate about waiting on God’s best! You DESERVE the best! So don’t settle, love yourself, and hold out! Your time will come!

Please share this with anyone you know it may help! And don’t ever hesitate to email me (getfitjess@yahoo.com) if you have questions or need advice.

Until next time, don’t forget to love yourself!

xo

Becoming a Proverbs 31 Woman

becomingproverbs31woman Becoming a Proverbs 31 Woman

I never knew what the Bible said about health and could care less about following what it said or about losing weight (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). 

I spent most of my life being overweight and unhappy. I didn’t workout or exercise and I had no idea about getting in shape or anything related to fitness. I struggled with a body image disorder even after losing weight. So I want you to know that we all struggle from time to time. Let me share my journey with you on how I lost weight and how God transformed my entire life.

I have always believed in God my entire life, but I never had a relationship with Him or even knew what that meant.

I was forced to go to church when I was younger and I did not understand anything about it. My parents finally stopped making us go once I got to high school and I never went back to church until I was 21 years old.

When I was in college, I was very far away from God and my lifestyle reflected that (1 Corinthians 10:31).

I actually started dating someone who was in the military when I was 18 years old and we were engaged within 6 months of dating.

I got married at 19 years old and divorced by the time I was 20 years old.

Once we got married and moved in together, it completely tore us apart.

We did not know each other well enough and we rushed in to something that should be taken very seriously. I was in to partying back then, and my ex husband had a drinking problem. We tried to go to marriage counseling to mend our relationship because we continuously argued.

The counseling did not help us and I could not handle the emotional abuse anymore (2 Peter 1:5-6). 

I consulted with my mom because I knew that God was against divorce. But, there were times when my ex husband and I got in to arguments and it almost turned in to physical abuse. With the help of my parents, I decided that it would be best to go through with the divorce.

After my divorce was finalized, I started dating someone quickly after.

We met in college. Dating this person helped me become more confident in myself because he treated me completely different than my ex husband. That confidence helped me to quit smoking cigarettes (I smoked a pack a day) and made me want to take care of my body. I lost 60 lbs by starting to eat healthier and doing home workouts. Even though I lost weight, I was still not confident and had a body image disorder because I still felt like I was fat.

This was the first stage of becoming a Proverbs 31 woman.

Things started to become very serious with my boyfriend. I moved to another state after graduating college, but we decided to stay together. We only saw each other on the weekends, but we grew closer and closer.

We talked about getting engaged and married some day.

However, our relationship didn’t really seem to be moving forward. We were living in two different cities and that caused us to argue because we were so unhappy with not being able to see each other often.

My unhealthy relationship affected every other area of my life (1 Corinthians 3:17). 

I couldn’t see my life without him, so I decided to keep trying for a while. One day I decided that after three and a half years together, I could not go on being so unhappy. I loved him a lot and didn’t think I could survive by myself being single because I had never really done that before. We had many differences and I had recently started going to church again and wanted to get more involved, but we didn’t see eye to eye on that.

I decided to end things with him, which was probably the hardest thing I’ve ever done emotionally, even harder than my divorce.

We continued talking back and forth for a few months after the break up, which wasn’t helping me move on. I still also had a body image disorder and struggled with my self-esteem. But, I had started going to church more often after our break up. Then I ended up recommitting my life to Christ again and got baptized.  Once I made this decision, God literally helped me change everything about my life.

This is when the other stages of becoming a Proverbs 31 came to fruition. 

I finally started to have more confidence from losing weight and leading a healthier lifestyle.

But, I was not mentally or spiritually healthy. God gave me the strength and courage to join a Bible study with a group of women I didn’t know. He also gave me the courage to start volunteering at church and in the community. This is where God truly transformed me mentally and spiritually.

I Can Do All Things Through Christ Becoming a Proverbs 31 Woman

I began to read the Bible, pray, and learned what having a relationship with God really meant (1 Corinthians 9:27).

I stopped being so afraid to go outside of my comfort zone and meet new people. I started coming out of the depression from my break up. I met so many amazing people who impacted my life and helped me grow to where I am now healthy mentally and spiritually.

A divorce and break up from a long-term boyfriend were extremely hard situations to go through (Philippians 4:13).

But, I would not be who I am now if it weren’t for these situations. I never thought I would be able to say that I ran a half marathon, got my Master’s degree, went on a mission trip to Poland, and become a health and fitness coach to help others achieve their goals.

I am now living by myself with my two kitties, and enjoy being single.

I am healthy spiritually, mentally, and physically, and I am working on becoming the best woman I can for God and His kingdom.

 

I wanted to share this with you in hopes that it will just touch one of you and help you in some way. I still struggle sometimes, you’re not alone.

 

Comment below and share what you’re going to do to inspire or encourage others today! : )